Friday, January 05, 2007 @11:11 PM
DISAPPOINTED.this is the only word i can use to describe the way im feeling now.[Strictly NO Reprimanding or Blaming or Scolding Involved.]
for all that we did. for all that we sacrificed. this is what we get in return ? then we must really have done something really wrong. the school may not appreciate us. its okay. pissing, but forget it. its out of our league. but in our own guiding family. our own sisterhood. we get such treatment, i really dont know what to say. minority is great. but majority, do you guys care ? wheres the sisterhood ? the care ? the love ? wheres "One For All, All For One" ? where did all of the most impt things in guiding go ? do you guys care ? or do you guys only care about yourself ? yr good friends ? yr bestfriends ? how about the rest of yr sister guides ? dont they mean anything to you guys ? when it comes to fun, games, cheer, songs. wow. so united. girlguide rocks. but when it comes to work. hard work. where is that spirit ? when the banner girls were bringing up the banner. they were stuck half-way up. the big long heavy spars where hanging above their heads. possibility of falling & hitting each & every guide that was supporting it. we screamed for help. what did you guys do ? did you guys run over & supported the spars ? maybe only a hand full. from what i see, less then 5. maybe only 3 or lesser. if i dont get the numbers right, sorry. you guys continued to sit there, watching, eating, chatting, laughing & giggling away ! what kind of attitude is this ? is this how sister guides should be ? you'd rather sit there & eat, caring about yr own interest, than running over & give a helping hand. what is this ? truely. think about it ? if you were one of the banner girls. & yre in need of help. but no one was there. & the spars just fell, hit yr head & what ? hospitalised ? would any of you be able to live with that guilt for yr entire life ? if you were the one hit. what would YOU do ? its all a matter of choice. we always enphasized on sisterhood, sister guides. but do our words mean nothing at all ? so what if we win many many awards ? so what if we are the best in everything ? if even such selfish act is coming out from us, those material awards dont mean anything at all. nothing. i fought hard with my parents the day before campfire night. they wanted me to quit guides. but i wanted to stay on. i wanted to be part of guides, guiding. as guiding really meant alot to me. & im hoping it also does to all of you. but i was really, really disappointed. about how you girls reacted. im not blaming you girls. its the choice you girls make. & its the choice you girls will live with forever. but i feel, we must have did something or did not do something, seriously wrong for the outcome we have today. i really lost "it" today. & i want to find it back. but im really disappointed. i dont know what to say. we must have really done something wrong. do you girls even take our words for real ? if so, then why when we said "RUN !" we still see 3/4 of the company walking. either that, or they would make a joke out of it, "Run Some More ~" & continue to walk. what is this ? im not saying that yre not allowed to joke. yes. we love to joke too. who dont love jokes. but you girls are old enough to differentiate when to play & when to be serious. if we are hush to you girls, you girls become unhappy & thats not what we want. but if we joke, you girls dont know when to end. then what are we to do ? know when to joke, & when to be serious. know when to get work done. if you find that standing infront of so many girls & talk is a easy task, because its only talking, seriously. tell us. we would let you try. & things may change. soon, the sec4s would be stepping down. & guides still have to go on. we depend on you girls to withstand & uphold it. not only the sec3s. or the next CL, ACL. it depends on each & everyone of you. Every Guide Matters. the theme for our ATC. did you guys learnt anything from the camp ? we will not be there to guide you girls anymore. you will have to stand infront of the new sec1s & give command. lead. if you girls dont learn now, dont take up more responsibility, what will happen to guides ? the seniors will never be there to spoon feed you girls forever. you must take over us. take over our position & lead the sec1s.thats all i have to say.
but still, thanks for yr positive attitude. althou many were unhappy, but i believed you girls still had fun (: in some way or another. (: Law 7. thanks. (:althou the school did not show much appreciation & we felt really casted out by them, you girls could still keep that smile up. this shows that you guys can do it. even overcoming yr strong emotions. (: so i have faith in you guys. & i know that you guys will be able to change & learn from yr mistakes (: as long as you guys put yr hearts to it & work together. Keep It Up ! :D those words i said earlier on were not meant to scold you or reprimand you. its just to let you girls reflect. if you read it & feel like it doesnt affect you at all, its okay. if you feel its crap, its okay too. but i hope you girls would reflect on it. Canadian Vesper. we all sang it. did you sing it for the sake of singing ? look into the lyrics. understand it. & check with yr heart. did you do it ? i hope none of you after reading these feel criticised or hurt. cos its meant solely for you to reflect. [Strictly NO Reprimanding or Blaming or Scolding Involved.]
if you feel that honestly, you did yr part, you did yr best, then good for you (:
im happy that you feel that way. (: honest (: so dont be afraid to be true to yr feelings (: if you feel that yre not what i said, yre not. (: cos only you know. (: you can lie to everyone, except yr heart. (:
